Thursday Before the Friday

I'm scribbling at work...
I draw a dick...
A clear as day big headed shlong...
Why did I just draw a weiner right in the middle of my notes?
What if someone saw this? What if someone reads this?
A little bit here and a bit more there...
Ahh now I have a big arrow with balls...
That won't do it...the original drawing is still darker showing through...
a bit more...scribble scribble...
Now I have a star trek ship...that'll have to do...
I think I have filled 400 pages with unreadable notes and stupid sketches...
I always draw Bart Simpson...then I turn his neck into a boot?
I suck at drawing but the Weatherman says snow is in the forecast...
The office is buzzing with talk of early dismissal...some things never change...
But I know exactly when it's gonna snow...The second the last person who has the power to send us home early leaves the parking lot...
Remember those days...sunny all day then as you walked off the school bus it started raining..
Dear Misses Nature...please adjust all rain happenings to occur Monday thru Friday from Midnight to 3pm...Unless it's sunday and I don't want to mow the lawn but I've been saying that I'm going to...then let it rain :)
1-603-880-9100 Another number I scribbled down on my notes...couldn't take one ADD second to write down who's number this is...I moved once and wrote stupid stuff on all the boxes...my buddy laughed at me 2 months later when I unpacked them and couldn't find anything...

If only I had a dime... Actually I have hundreds of dimes...Every time I find change I throw it in my desk drawer at work...In about 2 years I can retire...People here see it and call me nuts...but really all I'm doing is emptying change out of my pockets...Why do people say that everything is nuts...Who raised these freaks?...I'm going to start finding the most heinous, ridiculous websites that I can...then I'm gonna send blind links to these "Normal" folks...Call the link "Mobile Gas Discount Coupon"...that'll get em....Then blam...
You could probably send them that email like ten times before they caught on...Cheap gas..that gets people motivated...Even when they knew they were gonna get sent to a midget porn site they would still want to click because maybe just maybe there was free gas at the other end of that link...

You know what I like listening to people bitch about...ATM fee's..."Can you believe they are charging me $2.00 to take money out!!?!?"...come on people get over it...Nothings free in this world...christ you have to pay fifty cents to fill your tires with air...There have been ATM fees for years now...Nothing stops you from taking enough money out the last time so you wouldn't have to this time...True Story...Block Island...Family in front of me...Blonde woman late thirties...very fit for a mother of three...three healthy, beaming children, huge beaming diamond on her left hand...Like the size of chocolate chip...She hit's enter on the machine and just goes off...$3.00 dollars....I can't believe it...this is unbelievable...Oh my god...What do these people think we are made of money???...
I mean come on lady...You just got off the friggin boat to Block Island in front of me...you knew you were going to be spending money here? You should be happy that it only costs your stupid ass three bucks since you forgot to bring money...I wish that machine wasn't there and her kids had to suffer...No three scoop sugar cone for you sweety...your mom's a miserable human...

One more...Breakfast place...AJ's in North Haven...Saturday Morning...Grabbing a couple breakfast sandwiches before heading out for the morning...guy beside me with a girl on his arm...you could tell this was a fresh connection...these were not two people that have been married for 20 years...in my opinion this girl is just a little too good for this guy...anyways...the bill comes to $14.02...the guy hands the 16 year old a $20...the chick starts counting out 98 cents...I look down and see the need a penny take a penny thing with about 20 cents in it...but I'm the only one...ha!...at this exact second my sandwiches are ready...He starts out in front of me...The guy just goes off...This is bullshit...she gave me 98 goddamn cents...I come to this place every week and she gives me 98 fucking cents...man oh man...I almost pooped my pants...I wanted to just start screaming at this guy...too stupid to see the penny thing and he's mad for no reason...classic...

In 2nd grade I got my first part in a school play...I was a bush...a freaking bush...what a joke...I basically held a board up that faintly resembled a bush (it was painted by second graders after all) but half way through the first part of the play I realized this is great...no lines to screw up...no routes that I'd forget to walk...just stand there and observe...Damn it I made a fine bush...

The MouseMan Prophecies

One day the little man went to play beside his house

Where upon an old dead stump he found a tiny mouse

His head was missing from a fuss he'd had the night before

Now the little boy was wondering what this all was for

Had he hurt the animal that chose to takes it's head

Or had he disrespected it with words he may have said

But as the boy was pondering the fate of this poor mouse

A drop of rain fell from the sky and forced him in the house

Where upon his entry he'd discover something new

And from the fate of this discovery his crying would ensue

His mom was laying traps around to kill these little pests

To keep them from eating all their food and laying little nests

Now the boy was puzzled and most certainly confused

But his lack of adult apathy would help to light the fuse

That would cause the explosion of tears that filled the night

For he hadn't gained the ability to overlook what's right...

I work with 8-Year Olds

Bobby used my wiffle bat and now it's dented...Sal used my stapler and didn't put it back in my drawer...

Susie called Wendy and they went ice skating without me...Linda called Lisa and they went to lunch without me...What do they have a conspiracy going or something?

Chris ate all the ice cream and didn't leave me any...Henry always drinks the water and never changes the water bottle...

Look Jimmy has highwaters on...hahahhahahaha...Larry wears the same Khakis everyday...

Joey didn't come home when the streetlights came on Dad...Frank took his afternoon break at the end of the day and left 15 minutes early boss...

Johnny didn't come to school today I heard his Dad beat him...Roger called in today...I heard he got all drunk last night with some chick...

Good job Sam since you usually get F's and you got a C on this test I'll give you a prize... Don you fixed everything, flew around country, and learned every aspect of your job...Why are you 5 minutes late this morning?

Lunch and Recess are still my two favorite classes...

Wasteful Youth?!?!?

The frogs are an amazing band...So fun...so pure...noone is like that anymore...so serious...I'm looked at for being immature and nuts...I'll tell you how it is...I'm just having fun...Doesn't anyone have fun anymore?Can't you have fun and be responsible too?People are ruined...They have taken all of your joy away...They have made you lose all joy in everything that used to be fun...Drugs...ruined...Sex...ruined...Music....ruined...Television...Ruined...Food...ruined...
People work 8 hours a day, 5 days a week, 52 weeks a year....
That's 2080 hours a year...
That's a lot of life...
How many people do you know that actually have money?
I don't mean riches...those people don't get it...
I mean have money...
People that earn $40,000 a year but live like they did when they earned $30,000 a year...
Just have a little in the bank. No credit debt...A Cushion?
I don't know many like that...
Everyone lives just slightly higher than they can afford...
Leaning forward while they walk...not enough to fall just enough to keep you moving...
Well fuck that shit my fine feathered friend...
I'm winning this game...
Retirement is now...
I know...I know...
college, masters, PHD, Job with a suit, big house, kids, a dog....
yes yes fun yes...

I have no car payment...I refuse to...I have a tiny mortgage...I worked hard to get there...I have very few credit card bills...makes more sense than to have them...

I bought a thing the other day that cost $500 and showed a person at work...They said "Well it must be nice to not have responsibilities and bills and be able to waste money like that."

HA! Ha fucking ha!...you're the one wasting money pal...

You drive a $35,000 car...You have credit cards out the ass...You have a huge mortgage...I'm wasting money....You give more money away in interest than I spend in in a month...but I'm wasting money...You made the purchases that buried you in debt...but I'm wasting money...some people are so friggin stupid...