Interesting????

If you get a cut in your nose and a scab forms and you pick it

Is that considered a scab or a booger?

I mean can you eat it or is it gross because it's a scab?

Eating a booger is gross but people do it.

Eating a scab is just plain gross...

Subway Sucks Round #2

Subway blows...

I'm sick of it...

I keep going in and I keep walking out feeling like a schlep...

I couldn't take it anymore so I sent them this email...we'll see how it goes...


Dear Subway,

I went into Subway across the street from my work in Madison CT...the employee that made my sub didn't speak, didn't smile, didn't acknowledge my existence at all and the portions were measily...I got a Foot long subway club...I think I saw him place four slices of roast beef, three slices of turkey, three slices of ham, and three triangles of cheese...I realize that I could order Double Meat for 2 dollars more...which would bring the cost of that sub well over 7 dollars...but I can also walk into any non fast food sub shop in the area and get a sub for 4-5 dollars that has three times as much meat as the double meat option...I used to enjoy subway...it was decently priced and the portions were good...lately it seems that the portions have become smaller and smaller...I know Jared wants to lose weight eating subway but when I want to lose weight I'll go to a Gym...when I order a sub I want some meat. I apologize for the tone of this email but this is just exactly what goes through my mind everytime I walk out of a subway restaurant.

Don

It figures...

If you fix pipes you are a plumber…



If you fix cars you are a mechanic…



If you fix teeth you are a dentist…



If you fix computers you are a geek…

Is there such a thing as an informal gathering?

Let's play dress up...

Wear expensive clothes, too much makeup, and overbearing designer scents...

I'm so friggin sick of "Dressing Up"...

We have to dress business casual at work...

No jeans, must have collars, no open-toed shoes...

We have a christmas party tonight...it's at 6pm...we get out at 5:30pm...

People actually brought clothes to work to change into to go to this party...

I'm getting ridiculed because I didn't think to bring a suit to wear,

to stand around at a restaurant with these people I'm stuck with all day...

You gotta be kidding me...

Some people are telling me to drive home and then back to the restaurant...

That's over an hour of driving...

Fuck this dress up business world of overpaid, underknowledged, cheating, lying, underacheiving, pre-madonna, power hungry, two-faced, ASSHOLES!

I'm going like this...

Stories like these make me happy to be alive...

To deal with the city's mounting dog litter problem, officials in Anchorage, Alaska, proposed in May to help call recalcitrant dog owners' attention to the problem by squirting a dab of peanut butter on each pile of dog poop in the parks and on sidewalks. (The idea is that owners would more conscientiously clean up so that their own dogs would not be tempted to try to eat the peanut butter.) [Anchorage Daily News, 5-20-02]


A friggin brilliant solution to a simple problem...Nothing would make me laugh harder than watching a bunch of people trying to stop their dogs from eating other dogs poop...

Alaska you rule!

And I don't understand this dance club thing...

I saw a girl tonight...

Pretty as a button...so to speak...

had her boobs out...bra exposed...

slut-move...but this was no slut-move...right?

Then she walked outside...

and a man who obviously tans walked by...

Cat calls...

His hair was frosted and spiked up in the front...

He had large earrings in both ears...

she spun...and approached like the ring of a talking toy cord...

I'm astounded...

"He wants your naked ass on his lap so he can brag to his friends" I yelled inside...

but I'm not sure it mattered...

Insecurity is a powerful beast...

like Heroin only everyone has it...

Who's more troubled?... I thought

Who didn't teach her integrity?

Who taught him this is acceptable?

Instinct?

Lion pride?

Do these people have as much sex as they advertise?

Or is this a demonstration?

The dance of intimidation?

Do they all go home alone?

I bet they hate themselves right?

I'm just guessing...I'm just asking?...don't go hold me accountable for this shit...

I just looked at her boobs...that where our relationship ended..

I don't want her trouble around here...

I'm a happy miserable human...

Scary I tell you...

Like the snake with the wormlike tail...

hidden in the sand...

man that looks like a worm...

Writhing about in pain...

Attracting the next in line in the food chain...

Problem is I didn't just see one Provocative female ad tonight...

I didn't just see one frosted young buck...

I saw many...

Too many...

This is destructive habitat...

Earwax gets you the pussy...

Sitting in bed...

Watching the Yankees blow a lead...

Petting our kitty...

Suddenly I get an itch in my ear...

Pinky in and twist...

ahhh....

I go to resume petting and I'm slathered...

and this ain't a cat that likes to lick...

It's just a cat that loves my earwax.